Emmerdale star Jaye Griffiths courageously spoke about her experience of past abuse on Thursday’s episode of Loose Women.
The 62-year-old actress, who portrays Celia Daniels on the ITV soap, broke down as she revealed, “I don’t know how I survived.” She appeared on the show on Thursday (November 13) as part of the Facing It Together campaign.
The initiative, supported by domestic abuse charities Women’s Aid and SafeLives, aims to raise awareness of the support available to those affected by domestic abuse.
During her interview, Jaye reflected on the process of rebuilding her life after enduring physical and emotional abuse in a previous relationship.
“I look back and feel sorry for her, and I’m saddened that it took me so long to free myself and find myself again. How did I even survive it? How did I manage to go to the shops? I was still working,” she said.
“It’s humiliating. You lose a sense of who you are, and the shame is overwhelming. I want anyone in that situation to know — it’s not your fault.”
Discussing the coercive control she endured, Jaye became emotional as she explained: “You never knew what might trigger it. You didn’t know what not to do. If you made the tea the wrong way, there could be consequences. So you had to be extremely careful even asking how someone wanted their tea, because it could lead to repercussions.
“If you put the milk in the wrong spot in the fridge, there could be consequences too. Then eventually, you get your own fridge, and suddenly, it doesn’t matter where the milk goes.”
Describing the painstaking process of reclaiming her life, Jaye tearfully shared that she had to “start small,” beginning with simple choices like whether she wanted tea or coffee.
“And what do I want right now? Because whatever I choose now, there won’t be any consequences. If I pick a cup of tea, the world won’t fall apart. If I pick a cup of coffee, I can even change my mind — and there will be no repercussions,” she said.
“Those are the small choices you can finally make for yourself because, for so long, you didn’t know who you were. All you did was try to keep the peace. You existed just to maintain things, and suddenly, you’re back, on your own, and able to do things… you can celebrate little victories.”
The actress went on to say that it took her a very long time to trust herself again, and that her new boundaries are now “set in stone.”
“Those words are incredibly powerful when you can say them to yourself: ‘I will never be in that position again. I will never feel so small and insignificant.’ To have been told how worthless you were,” she broke down.
Jaye admitted it has been “frightening” to realize how many strong women have gone through similar experiences. She also offered guidance and support to anyone currently facing abuse.
“You’re not alone. In many ways, it’s not personal — it’s not about you. You are exactly who you’re meant to be. Try to celebrate small victories throughout your day,” she said.
“Remember that things will change, you will heal, and you will rediscover yourself. And for friends who know or suspect someone is experiencing abuse, show patience and care, and remind them that they are enough. They are valued.
“Reach out to the authorities, go to the police. Speak to someone — people will support you. I didn’t, and I wish I had.”
Reflecting on her life now, Jaye emotionally added: “Now that my life is calm and peaceful, and I’m no longer living in fear every single day, it’s truly remarkable.
“And yet, I’ve found myself again. I’m living a beautiful life, and though it may sound clichéd, I love my home, my husband, and the gentle, quiet life we lead. There’s no drama at home.”
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